Not Losing It

Hoo boy, what a week. Last weekend was very relaxing because a good chunk of my friends went out of town. Most were in Munich, where Oktoberfest may or may not have been happening. My friends may or may not have had an awesome time.

As for me? What did I do... Well, my "Czech buddy" flatmate and I assembled Ikea furniture for our living room, as well as a dresser for my roommate. Her English and my Czech may not be perfect, but we bonded through the universal language: absurd Ikea instruction manuals.

Scholars maintain the meanings of these mysterious inscriptions were lost several centuries ago.

The weather on Saturday was lovely so I walked around the city all day, trying to get lost so I could explore some new areas. The funny thing was, I couldn't. I would walk down a street that looked unfamiliar, and then suddenly I realized I knew exactly where I was. So I might have failed at getting lost, but it was exciting to discover that Prague is becoming a familiar place.

While I was out not-getting-lost, several other FS friends went to the Plum Festival on Petrin Hill. I wish I would've gotten lost there-- plums, plum desserts, plum brandies, plum EVERYTHING as far as the eye could see. And a-pear-antly my friends also found a pear orchard around there with all sorts of goodies. My friend bought a little thing of honey wine-- it is definitely worth trying if you ever find some.

Something definitely NOT worth trying if you ever go to Prague: the blacklight theatre. Last night a few friends and I saw a blacklight performance called "Aspects of Alice" because, hey, the brochures were cool looking. But it was... well, let me put it this way: there was live nudity and the show STILL had nothing going for it. Blacklight theatre A.) is a horrendous excuse for a tourist attraction, and B.) has nothing to do with Prague culture. Our advisor advised us not to go, but how were we to know to trust her advice?! So take mine: if you want an authentic experience in Prague, you won't find it on a brochure.

Prague-By-Numbers

When I was little, one of my favorite activities was those Paint-By-Numbers pictures that you pick up at craft stores. They were great. One second you were just looking at a bunch of sparse little brown blobs, the next you had a marvelous picture of labrador retriever puppies frollicking in a meadow. With ducklings.

Wow, I just made that up. Google Images really DOES have everything.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that sometimes the best way to paint the right picture is to fill it in bit by bit (or number by number), and it's only the complete whole that shows you what you're looking at. I'll attempt to do this with Prague by providing a number of little details I've noticed since being here.



1. This is sort of a broad generalization and certainly doesn't apply to everyone, but I've noticed that people don't smile a lot. However, if you engage in a conversation with them long enough and you don't come off as a complete jerk, they accept you. You have to earn the kindness of others.

2. There are spiders. Everywhere. I don't know how many other people have noticed it, but those gross, spindly spiders make hotels out of every store sign and railing in this city.

3. The street cleaners (however you call them) look like Oompa Loompas:

Just remember kids, that's NOT chocolate they're picking up.

4. Dogs are rarely on leashes. They don't need them. Imagine: a world where all dogs get along. And All Dogs Go To Heaven.

Thank you, ADG2H, for complicating everyone's childhood by featuring physically attractive animated dogs.

5. But in the Czech Republic, anyway, the consensus seems to be that all dogs die and slowly decompose into the earth. Religion isn't so big around here. There's the Jewish Quarter, of course, but most of Czech society doesn't really seem to have a religious or spiritual pull.

6. Beer is cheaper than water. Just sayin'.

7. Apparently, only recently has peanut butter become a big thing over here.

8. While we're talking about food: Czechs love KFC.

Perhaps I'll update this list as more strikes me. For now it's all just sort of engulfing me. And I love it.

Hooray For Backtracking!

So I've been in Prague for almost four weeks now.

*chirp*
*chirp*
*chirp*

FOUR WEEKS?! That's like... like... one fourth of the program! AHH QUARTER-LIFE CRISIS!

So as someone who's been here for a whole honkin' month, by now I'm what you might call a Prague expert. That's right. I have completely assimilated into Prague society. Why, just the other day while I was riding across the street on a Segway Tour I nearly got hit by a car, and the driver yelled at me... in Czech!* Surely this was because he had mistaken me for a local and thus assumed I spoke the language. The fool! But then again, his mistake is understandable. I mean, I just scream native-born Czech citizen:

On the mining tour in Kutná Hora. The mines are where ALL the locals hang out.

Pulling up this cheeseball photo reminds me that I never talked about Kutná Hora. What the what?! It's only one of the coolest places I've gone to since I've been here! So let me tell ya 'bout it, stud.

Kutná Hora is a historic town about 45 minutes from Nové Město. Our FS group took a bus there with students from other study abroad programs. The first place we visited was the ossuary.

"What the poop is an ossuary?" you might be asking yourself.**

Well, imagine a quaint little church. Now imagine that quaint little church is adorned WITH THOUSANDS OF ACTUAL HUMAN BONES.

Ooga Booga Booga!

It was pretty crazy. I have to say that I had mixed feelings about it, though. There's something vaguely upsetting about standing in the middle of a holy place filled with peoples' bones, and seeing it overrun with tourists. There were people all over the place taking pictures and posing with the skulls. It seemed a little insensitive. And as I was just as much a tourist-taking-pictures as the rest, I was at odds with myself. In any case, the ossuary was a very fascinating place and definitely worth visiting, despite this predicament.

The other really cool place we went to in Kutná Hora was the mines. It was a tour through the old silver mines-- POZOR (warning): Not recommended for the claustrophobic! I didn't understand the full force of this until we were six stories underground in an impossibly narrow tunnel. There were some pretty tight squeezes traveling through the mines and it was unnvering for some... i.e. only me. But it was a very unique tour, and beautiful (however terrifying). Oh yeah, and the best part is we had to wear robes and helmets to protect us from dripping water and low-hanging ceilings. Needless to say, we all looked like the bees knees.

Ugh... here we go...

Freaking out?! Who's freaking out? I'M NOT FREAKING OUT!!!

In addition to the ossuary and the silver mines, we saw the St. Barbara cathedral. The word "purdy" comes to mind.

And that's Kutná Hora! Welp, I'd better sign off and change into something that doesn't look like a hobo costume. We've got two birthdays in the FS program this week. That means one huge night of partying, right? Wrong. It means TWO huge nights of partying!


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*None of this actually happened. But I really want to do one of those Segway Tours.

**You might be asking yourself something much more explicit, but as my travel blog was recently selected to be used by CIEE, there's gonna be a few changes around here-- namely, the layout's going to be a little less dreary and the language is going to be a little nicer. And "poop" is just about the nicest word I can think of.

We Interrupt Prague to Bring You... Berlin!

What have I been up to? An excellent question, with many answers. As I repeatedly say, there is always something to do around here, and I have been doing those things of which are to be done.

Yes, I am always this articulate.

Well, first off, the ballet was incredible. We walked ALL THE WAY to the National Theatre in our nicest get-ups... so about a three minutes total. Now, this ballet was not your average Swan Lake. It was a contemporary performance called Graffiti, featuring some incredible modern dance numbers. The entire thing was a visual jambalaya of movement, costumes, props, and this crazy configuration involving mirrors and a film projection that I STILL can't really figure out how they did. So you'd have dancers moving on stage, and simultaneously their doppelganger hologram thing would be dancing alongside them. My favorite number was a couple dancing to a medley of Yann Tiersen compositions, and they incorporated a table and chair into the choreography in ways that would have made me fear the for the safety of the dancers had it not been obvious that they knew what they were doing. SO TO CHALK IT UP: As someone who really enjoys dance, film and pretty colors, I was a big fan of this ballet. Although I was a little disappointed that none of the dancers turned into a giant bird and bled to death backstage.

But I'm crossing my fingers for next season!

When I'm not watching incredible contemporary ballets, the majority of my time is spent in school. Classes work in a weird way over here; or maybe it's just the program. I dunno. All in all I'm taking about 11 different courses: Screenwriting, Camera and Film Language, Directing, Acting, Cinematography, Editing, Sound, Czech, Script Analysis, Circulating Within the Postmodern Cinematic Image, and Subjective Subversions. Most meet about once a week, so the number of hours I spend in school is about the same as what it would be back home. Plus, these courses all tie together and revolve around Film, so I'm pretty dandy with my academic schedule.
I'll admit, some classes are more fun than others-- I really like Screenwriting and Acting, but I despise Cinematography and Film Language. I'm trying to give them a fair chance, but a lot of the information is just incredibly over my head. To each her own, I say.

Thursday was nerve-wracking because we all pitched our ideas in front of each other and Jan Fleischer (our Screenwriting professor) for the first time. Talk about cut-throat: All 16 of us would pitch our own individual ideas, and from those 16 it would be whittled down to just 6.

DUN DUN DUN.
(to be read dramatically, preferably while envisioning the dramatic gopher).

Exactly.

After several (million) (times a billion) (times infinity) (squared) (and one more) constructively critical comments from our professor, we took time over the weekend to revise our ideas and flesh them out, then present our fuller ideas on Monday. Oh, look at that-- TODAY is Monday!

So, yeah, it all went down this mornning. Everyone's pitches went fine, mine included. It was just the system of voting for stories that got muddled... we were using a strange system that didn't make much sense. As a result, I think a lot of people were denied a fair chance to have their stories get picked. Fortunately, I was lucky enough to get fair chance. My story (about the friendship forged between a boy and his pet hobo-- it's cute how you think I'm joking) hung in for a while, but sadly did not make the final cut. That's all right though, because now I'm going to be working on the script for one of the other stories that I really liked. I'm super stoked to get this project going. And I'm debating whether or not to disclose the plot here... it might be a fun surprise for you (yes YOU), my dear reader, to find when we make the film.

But enough about this morning's harrowing pitching session. Lemme tell ya'll 'bout my weekend... in Berlin?!

That's right. My roommate and I took a 5 hour bus ride to Berlin for the weekend. We stayed in an AWESOME hostel called Plus Berlin. My only prior conception of hostels was this movie:

So you can imagine my relief when I opened the door to our room and saw this:

Though I might go so far as to say the room was just a BIT too pink.

This place also had an indoor pool and sauna, which we hit up. RIGHT?! So cool. There we met a number of kids from Germany, the Netherlands, Belgium, etc. The best experience of Berlin was probably talking to all of these people from different places. Oh! And our one other roommate in the hostel was a girl from New York. She was really nice, and the three of us actually wound up going out for Thai food and spending a few hours in a nearby pub.

During the day Vera and I walked around, and went on an "alternative tour" of the street art in Berlin. This stuff is incredible:

lolwut

Also, I had the most incredible falafel at this place called 1001 Falafel.fd ks;futfu ihgaje roijklj;kjk  dfl. Sorry, that was my laptop short-circuiting because I drooled all over it just thinking about how delicious that falafel was...

Anyway, obviously one weekend was not enough time to see all that's worth seeing in Berlin. Of course I checked out the Berlin wall and Brandenberg Gate...

Some dude was blowing these huge bubbles... it's like he KNEW I wanted to take the coolest picture ever.

 ...but I'd like to return at some point to see some museums and take some Holocaust tours, all that good stuff. In the meantime, it's Prague sweet Prague, baby.

When Lovely Strolls Get X-TREME

Good gravy my feet are sore. Prague is a walking city. Everything you'd want to get to is walking distance, or else easily accessible by tram/metro. Coming from a place where public transportation is more like navigating through some kind of Saw IV-inspired torture chamber, the feasibility of using the metro and tram stations is mind-blowing.
My feet have been callousing nicely, but the reason they're so heinously sore right now is because I had a pretty incredible afternoon. To celebrate completing the final exam of our Intensive Czech course this morning, my friend Julia and I went on a walk to end all walks. With an extremely vague notion of where we wanted to go-- the Prague Eiffel tower thingamajig-- we walked from the National Theatre up to around Prague Castle. This is a slightly-uphill walk that takes around 15 minutes; nothing excruciating. But after wandering around the winding and increasingly steep cobbled streets we finally found: the mother of all staircases.

[If I didn't have the IQ of an eggplant I would have a dramatic photo here to show you what we were up against. Basically, envision a million stairs, and then copy that image, and then paste it above the original image. It was a lot of stairs.]
Once we got to the top of that monster of a hill (whose name I've probably been told a hundred times but can't remember), we finally found Petřínská rozhledna, the tower! And what should be waiting inside this lovely tower but more stairs. Only twice as steep, and winding. By the time I got to the top I was dripping with sweat, my leg muscles were shaking and I couldn't tell whether it was me or the tower that seemed to be tipping over. Cardio work-out for the day: Czech.

WOW WHAT AN INGENIUS AND ORIGINAL PUN.
Before I continue I have to give a small explanation of this tower, because I think it is a brilliant epitomization (<-- had to consult Dictionary.com to confirm I didn't just make that word up) of the Czech culture. Petřínská rozhledna was built around the same time as the Eiffel tower. In fact, it actually looks a lot like the Eiffel tower, except it is much, much smaller. But because of its position on the top of this huge hill (called Petřín; and yes, I HAVE been told the name of this mountain a hundred times) it is actually slightly higher than the Eiffel tower. Well played, Czech Republic.

So, we finally made it to the top of this cheeky little Eiffel tower. Exactly what kind of view are we talking about?

Kde je Waldo?

You have to work for a view like that.

Speaking of work and views (flawless segue?), there were a few maintenance guys working outside the tower. Talk about living on the edge. Imagine being suspended this high in the air simply to do your job each day.

The walk back down was a pleasant series of winding paths that each seemed to have their own agenda. We found our way back down to Staré Mesto and got home no problem. Now my muscles have just enough time to settle and get sore before tonight's event: ballet at the National Theatre! We're going to dress up quasi-classy (the only way I do classy) and enjoy an evening of fine art and high culture. And then we'll probably go get smashed at some bar.

Čau for now! (Oh yes, it DOES rhyme.)

Stumbling Around

Ahoj. It's been a few days since my last post, and a lot has been happening. The number of whirlwind adventures I've been having has reached an all-time high. I'm not sure if it's just because I'm in a new place, with new people, or if it's just built into the Czech culture, but there is ALWAYS something happening and ALWAYS somewhere to be.

A few days ago I went to the Prague Zoo. Okay... 90 Kc (like six bucks) to go to a zoo that is probably even larger than the one in San Diego? SRSLY? That's too awesome for words. As was the zoo. So here's a photo or two. I tried to limit my photo-taking at the zoo, because as one of my Film Studies (hereon referred to as FS) friends noted, you always wind up taking a bunch of mediocre pictures of animals and then do nothing with them.

Except I had to take pictures of the penguins because they're frickin' adorable.

This photo was taken from the chairlift. It was really steep and didn't exactly have seatbelts or reliable straps... livin' on the edge at the zoo.
So there's that. What else have I done these past few days... well, we've had Czech classes in the morning. Those are pretty fun. Sometimes. Classes are like three hours, which is pretty rough, especially if you've been out the night before. And since every night is going-out night, you don't exactly fly out of bed each morning to go learn Czech.

Yesterday we went to Prague Castle! PURDY.

On the tour our guide told us many interesting facts about Prague...

DID YOU KNOW?
Czechs used to have beer soup for breakfast. You mean like a bowl of beer? Yes, like a bowl of beer.

Welp, today was pretty great. Czech class was fun because we pulled a (slightly flawed, but whatever, it was funny) prank on our teacher. He was teaching us how to ask for and give directions, so he brought a blindfold and the class would have to direct one of our peers around the room in Czech. On the last try we made him wear the blindfold, and while he was being guided around the room we "silently" (totes didn't) snuck out of the room. He caught on pretty quickly so it kind of failed, but it was still pretty funny.

After class a group of us went to the National Gallery (or called something like that, I forget) and saw the exhibits. HOLY CHEESE BALLS. It was a MASSIVE 5-story gallery packed with thousands of paintings and sculptures and everything you can imagine. We must have spent at least 3 hours in there and still didn't have enough time. The art was beautiful. I especially enjoyed the surrealist collection. And I stood in front of actual Picasso paintings, speaking of surreal. I looked like a baby watching someone blow bubbles.
After the gallery we walked to a strange miniature carnival of sorts. Only it must have recently been attacked by zombies because NOBODY WAS THERE. But it was open and the rides were going. Buuuuut when we tried to go on a ride the guy told us to go away. What's going on here? So we just walked around and marveled at the unusual place. We sat by this area where I presume there must have been a building at some point, but nothing was left except for the tiled floor. I scooped up some scraps of the tile; I might try and make a mosaic with them.

AFTER THAT we walked to this amazing bar and talked for a little while over some drinks. Seriously, I wish my camera had been working when we were there. It's like a massive bar made out of iron tools and cogs and bits of scrap metal. It's something hipsters would lean against so they could take artsy over-saturated profile pictures. Really cool place. I'll definitely be going back.

AFTER THAT was a screening of some event in the square, about a five minute walk away. I stood around for a bit but I was hungry as a hippo so I returned to the apartment and made spaghetti. Speaking of spaghetti! Guess where we all went for lunch today? None other than the Louvre, a pretty restaurant frequented by the likes of Albert Einstein and Franz Kafka.

I didn't take this picture, buuut... here it is.

SAY WHAT?!

Good gravy I am tired. Last night was... dot dot dot. A couple FS friends put together a bonding extravaganza for our group involving Improv and a homeless Czech dude. It was a great night, but I haven't recovered yet. I need to go to bed. Spanks for reading. Dobre noc!